I always know when my life has turned from me organizing my days to a point where my days are organizing ME! A mental picture of crumbs laying on a table immediately comes to mind because that is exactly what I begin to offer loved ones and friends.
I don’t know about you but when my days are too jam packed all that I have leftover are the crumbs. This means the important things in life that deal with family and friends are overlooked. I feel stressed because I am stressed, and life begins to unravel. Deep Breath. I know how to fix this and even people who are great fixers, need to hit the pause button and stop the noise.
You probably know what I’m writing about though you may not want to say yes at this point, but I believe you will after reading on for a few more lines.
Years ago, I had clients who came to me seeking financial advice. But there was a first step in my process that they needed to take: They needed margin in their lives, but they kept pressing on believing that they were the only ones who could successfully run their company.
What they didn’t know at the time was, they were on track for a disaster and sure enough it struck!
A short time later, I found myself sitting in an ER with a wife who had just learned her husband had experienced a serious heart attack.
Instead of taking time for that second honeymoon, they had dug in deeper. They had come asking my advice about a dream vacation—a vacation they were now able to take.
Later, they admitted that all they had to offer friends, family, co-workers and even one another were the leftover crumbs from their lives, which was not much.
How to Know You’re in Trouble
In our “on-the-hamster-wheel” environment, entrepreneurs and leaders in general still find it hard to let go of calling all the shots. As unmodern as it may seem, many of us still cling to the adage: “If something needs to be done, I’m the only one who can do it!”
First: This line of thinking has never been true! Think of the countless executives who have faced layoffs, lost companies, and had to clean their offices out in a day! The companies that were left behind survived and many went on to thrive. Endlessly chasing the golden ring may reap you a bonus but at what cost? Relationships, mental and physical health, becoming older before it is time to be older!
The leadership style that places you alone at the center of the wheel is dangerous for your health and your future. People want to work with people who encourage growth—not fear it. If you have crumbs laying all over your table, chances are you are running through life three steps ahead of some type of fear—fear you won’t make it, fear you are not brilliant enough, fear you will be forgotten, fear your company will fail. Fear is bundled up with lies!
The truth is you can learn to take time to have a meal with your family, go to your child’s ball game, and take that vacation without losing. In fact, your gains will increase, and you will probably see an uptick in personal production. That’s a great ROI!
Second, when you adopt a mindset that leads you to believe you are “it,” then you are on track for a fall. The reigns of any company or department can and are often passed to others, especially when you are too tired, and your creative clock doesn’t chime! In other words, creative leaders need to learn how to grow, be flexible, motivate others to learn and then teach co-workers how to lead and one day take your place, if needed.
The person who is not threatened by change and growth is the person who leads the pack. There’s a realization that you have the power and ability to inspire an entire team to go out and make a mark in the market!
What are the signs of LDD?
If you are struggling in some of the ways I mentioned above, you may have what I call Lifestyle Deficit Disorder! So, what are symptoms?
• You never have enough time. Every minute goes to building a business that fits around your life. The opposite should be true: craft your life so that it includes time for others, yourself, and your business. Is life’s candle is burning at both ends and you feel like yours has met in the middle, it’s time to get off the hamster wheel—toda
• Inability to Delegate. Delegation does not come naturally. Most of us like to “stoke a fire inside.” Being the “one,” lights you up, turns on your brain, and makes you feel alive. But if you don’t learn to delegate, your business will always run you instead of you running your business. If you want freedom, delegation is the name of the game.
• Worries Over Money. You would not believe how many people I work with who, although they are making great money, are consumed by the fear of losing it! That’s the number one issue I hear. Once we scrape past the ego-driven “everything is fine” nonsense, we inevitably end up in conversations about fear of not having enough: not having enough money to fund a lifestyle now and not having enough to fund the future.
Most of the people I work with bring in plenty of money, but they lack efficient systems regarding cash flow, bills, collecting, and other financial matters. They don’t like the idea of paying someone to do their “books,” which is counterintuitive, because if they could offload some of those mundane tasks, they could be more productive!
People who are suffering from LDD are sick and most of the time they don’t even know it. They don’t realize that a healthy, balanced lifestyle with a thriving business makes you want to get out of the bed each morning.
I talk with clients about how they can achieve more Perfect Days. This means that even though life is so imperfect, especially in this sometimes code-red environment, they can still have what I call perfect days because they have learned to build meaningful margin into their lives. They have made the decision to get off the hamster wheel and have some time for themselves and to be with loved ones.
How often does your business intrude on your free time? Are you sacrificing your lifestyle because you are worried you won’t have enough for the future? Do you find yourself being tired and lacking energy? What ER moment is lurking around the corner that you could sidestep if you make the right decisions today?
I can show you how to hit the “reset button” There’s one inside all of us. As a recovering LDD-er myself and as someone who’s helped others cure their LDD, I can relate to what you’re going through. There is a way out!
Take this opportunity to get my book Perfect Day to learn how you can be finally free from LDD! Or you can sign up for a free consult with me. Let’s get on the road to having more Perfect Days starting today!
About The Author: Cokie Berenyi
Cokie Berenyi has been in financial services and serving the needs of individual and institutional clients and entrepreneurs since 1996. Mother, author, business owner, financial “samurai” and Perfect Day engineer, Cokie loves food, wine, travel, stray dogs, goat cheese, tennis, and alpine mountaineering.
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